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Honoring your spouse…it’s part of the promise

2010 November 12
by The Marriage Coach

Yesterday I was talking with a man in his eighties and he said something about his marriage that hit me like a bucket of cold water.  His wife passed away three years ago after they had been married for 54 years.  He sat very comfortably in his wheelchair and told me about all of the great times that they had shared over the years.  He talked about all of places they had traveled and about the struggles that they had faced together.  Then he said, “Gosh I miss her.  I miss loving her and honoring her.”

I had never heard anyone say anything like that before so I said, ‘”So you honored your wife?”  He smiled and said, “I certainly tried to.  I tried to honor her everyday”.   He went on to say that he thought the word love was used too much these days.  He said, “I love lots of things but I honored my wife”.

I’ll carry his words with me.  After all, isn’t that what most of us said that we’d do in the beginning?  At some point, didn’t we hold hands with our spouses and vow to love and honor them til’ death do us part?  It’s part of the promise that we made.

Dale Harcombe once wrote:   “Honoring your spouse means building them up and making others think well of them.  It means praising them and accepting them for who they are and not trying to change them into someone else.  It means honoring them with your actions and your words.  It means honoring them with your body and being faithful to them.  Not just in your actions but in your thoughts and imagination as well.”

Wow.  That’s tough.  Think about it, how have you honored your spouse this week?   It’s still part of the deal you know.  So this weekend, I challenge you to stay focused on honoring your husband or wife.  Find a way to let him/her know that they come first and that you love and honor them.

Give it a shot and let me know how it goes…


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